By: Mike Murphy, Manager of Alumni Services

One of the questions I get asked most by people, whether in recovery or not, is “What keeps you going?” For the first year or so, my answers would be all over the place. After all, I did learn a plethora of tools to use while I was a client at Transformations. But the more time passed, one thing always seemed to get me. The one thing that would always ignite a spark in me when I did this, and that is being of service to others.

Being of service to others is a cornerstone of any person in recovery. Just like we cannot do this alone, we can’t keep it to ourselves, as well, and for all intents and purposes, service is arguably the determining factor in where I am today. My entry into service, like many, started in my first AA Homegroup.

After a Sunday morning meeting, I noticed a bunch of guys my age, with tattoos, etc. staying behind to clean the room from top to bottom. I figured if this was going to be my first ever Homegroup, I might as well do my part. So, I stayed after and helped clean it up. This one decision would get the ball rolling. From this one act of service, a multitude of things happened. I met my first Sponsor who in turn introduced me to the other guys in the group. I now knew some sober guys just like me. Those guys convinced me to move into the halfway house down the street they all went to. I met my Grand Sponsor who would become my first boss in recovery and I will forever be grateful for him. If it weren’t for him and that job, I don’t know where I would be. He even helped me get a car. The same one I drive to and from Transformations every day. Now, cleaning toilets at an AA Homegroup might not sound like the most glamorous gig in the world, but it meant something to me and I took pride in it. Eventually, they would give me keys to the building. Imagine that. I was only a few months sober and these people were already trusting me with keys to the building, and the trust would only keep growing.

The next thing I knew, I was chairing a meeting every Tuesday night at 5:30. We would read from the book, “Living Sober,” which ironically enough, was the first book I ever read in recovery. On my very first night in Summit Detox, I stumbled upon it (literally stumbled, I came in HOT to detox. Reserve your judgment) and brought it back to my room. I still have that book. Did I just confess to stealing? Crap. Another amends to make. Back to the point. Now I was leading an AA meeting for not only my peers but people with decades of sobriety under their belts, and it felt incredible.

Then came the turning point. One night I noticed on the Transformations Alumni Facebook page that they were looking for an H&I commitment. I jumped on it and threw my hat in the ring. The idea to be able to come back to the place that helped save me and speak to people going through the same things I was at the same place I was just a few months earlier? It was a no-brainer. The first night I went, I will NEVER forget the feeling I had leaving the meeting. It was surreal. I think it was at that point, I knew I wanted to do something more closely related to treatment, and if I could do it at Transformations, why not?

Well, that call came a few months later. At first, I thought I was going to get lectured for my cursing during my H&I’s. I mean, as much as I tried to keep them PG-13, the Marine in me would take over from time to time. I couldn’t believe it. I was offered a job to work at Transformations. I was so taken aback by it, that I wasn’t quite sure how to answer. I had to call the person back to inform them that yes, I was very interested. I couldn’t help but call my Mother immediately afterward and tell her. I felt like a kid, again. Plus, I think part of me wanted to put it out there to make sure I wasn’t imagining it!

This brings me to where I am now. Not only am I an Alumni of Transformations, but I am now the Manager of Alumni Services for Transformations. And in a large part, all because of my willingness to be of service. I truly feel as though that’s what got the ball rolling for me. Believe me, that ball is still rolling, and when I feel it slowing down, I go back to what got it set in motion, to begin with. And just the other week, I got asked to go speak at my old Homegroup. It was so humbling and rewarding to be asked to go speak there. And know what? That feeling still hasn’t subsided. I left that meeting and felt like I was walking on air.

Who would have ever thought that being of service to others would be the ultimate sense of self-serving to me? Quite a difference from the old self-serving I was used to.

If you or a loved one are struggling, please reach out to Transformations!